There are people in need out there. Its my duty to help.

I checked my stats this morning, and I learned that I am already helping people!

Someone searched for ‘cold wax stuck’, as you can see. They found my illuminating and more-terrifying-than-a-bird-in-a-clown-suit post about the perils of cold wax. I’m guessing that because of me, they were either able to unstick scissors or a guinea pig–or a guinea pig wielding scissors– from their hoo-hah, which pretty much puts me right on course for some kind of humanitarian award in the field of hoo-hah saving.

As an aside here, and this is kind of important, ‘hoo-hah’s are not the same as ‘hooah’s. When Johnny Rotten was in the army, they said ‘hooAH’ a lot. It’s kind of just a grunt of ‘yes I heard you and yes we’re totally going to do whatever it is you’re asking Go Team Army!” kind of noise. Of course, ‘hoo-HAH’ is slang for vagina.  I can’t tell you how many times I nearly busted up laughing at Very Important Events because to my ear, it sounded like whole herds of soldiers were enthusiastically yelling the equivalent to “coochiesnorcher!” during inspirational times of whatever meeting they were attending. Yes, I am well aware of how immature I am. Yes, I totally think it should happen anyway. I’m an soon-to be awardwinning expert in this field, remember?








2 thoughts on “There are people in need out there. Its my duty to help.

  1. The word “coochiesnorcher” makes me think there needs to be a real product called a SnatchSnorkel. Jingle: When coming up for air would ruin the moment / And leave her sad and blue / Don’t fret or pout or sphixiate / SnatchSnorkeler is here for you!

  2. I have thought of another way such a product would be useful. Unfortunately in real life, the right combination of internal geometry, arousal, and unfortunate male technique can create situations in which one’s bliss is interrupted by what sounds like an enthusiastic Boston Terrier doing a dog paddle. Such snorting may be a sign of your mate’s devotion, but his apparently deviated septum is something of a mood wrecker.

    Not to fear! SnatchSnorkel’s patented VagiLung breathing system ensures air gets where it needs to be — not where it doesn’t.

    SnatchSnorkel– There’s no muff / too tuff

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