My Summer Vacation (an essay by NVC)

Miss me?


Of course you did. Tell the truth.

So. I havent posted in some time. Think of this as a note from my mommy, or my doctor, or some hobo down the street that I paid $5 and a bottle of Thunderbird to, in order to get a validish excuse.

The last time I talked to you, I was lamenting being chunky.  Darlings, I have lamented being chunky for a portion of my life as large as the servings of ice cream I eat, and thats saying a lot. As a fun aside here, did you know that large servings of ice cream have a direct influence on being chunky? It’s hard to believe, but its true. Id say it could be mathematically proven, but then, Id be tempted to draw graphs and invent formulas, and aint nobody got time for that.


I had a wild thought, only a few short months ago. What would happen if I actually tried? What would happen if I got off my rapidly spreading tush, put down the ice cream, and lifted weights or went running? I decided to try. You know, for science.

This happened:


And this happened too:


End result: belly shrunk. Ego exploded. Became insufferable.

Worth it? Yes.